02
Dec
06

Axl, saving the “e” for “douche bag”

It may be known to some out there that Eagles of Death Metal have been dropped, or dropped out of (depending on who you listen to) the latest Guns n’ Roses tour. You know the one, for that album. Chinese Democracy I think it’s called. I can’t really remember anymore. The thing has been in production since before I hit puberty. Honestly. That thing will probably be out just in time for an actual Chinese democracy.

I don’t want to take sides here without all the information available, but Axl Rose is a huge piece of shit. I think pretty much everybody who listens to music knows this. Even people who are just into avant garde jazzfusion. The only fans he still have left are about as shitty as he is. Any album that takes this long to produce ought to be pretty fucking awesome right? Wrong. The leaked tracks that showed up on the internet a couple of months ago told a whole other story.

Let me paint you a picture. If I ground up a Monster Magnet album, ate it and let it work itself down inside my body, destroying all tissue in its path, then when time came squatted over a microphone and bricked right on it. It would still sound better. Pure musical genius!

You have to wonder about Axl Rose’s fans as well. I mean, according to some people (among them Jesse Hughes) they booed and threw stuff at the Suicide Girls when they were up on stage. Given that their stage performance may be lacking. But it’s hot naked women, jumping around to music. You’d have to be a whole new level of repressed homosexual to not enjoy that. “Put those awesome tits away! I want Axl Rose’s cock in my face!”

More on this stuff here and here.

So to sum things up:
Axl RoseJesse “The Devil” Hughes

“Disappointment from Axl is Like Being Knighted.” -Dave Grohl

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